Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Heart piercings

Do you ever feel heart piercings? "a sword" suddenly into your soul? Lk 2:35 Does the experience with the pain you're feeling become universal? Do you think of your own personal suffering and then your mind begins to think of people around the world who are suffering? And feel you could weep a bucket of tears?

I never quite understood what was happening when I would experience this, but one summer in 2009 when I was attending a conference I heard an unusual homily that spoke to this.

Because women are created with such sensitivity we do experience suffering at deep levels. I think we can all attest to that.

These are some of my notes taken during Fr. Paschal’s homily at the conference that brought me insight and consolation, and more than anything the grace to embrace the strange, but blessed gift of heart piercings.

I will put what Fr. Paschal said in quotes and comment or interpret with my life experience.

     "Often we don’t realize the power of our prayer. When our heart is pierced our prayers are powerful...We can only experience this power when we are nailed to the cross in surrender."

I felt this connection, when my heart's been pierced, with the world; a universal sense of suffering, but I didn't go so far as to believe that it could have so much power until I heard this. This thought helped me understand the value of the experience and not be resistant or think I was odd. Somehow, through the teaching, I received more grace to surrender. To say, "Yes, Lord to your will and your ways!"

     "We capture God’s attention. God’s weakness is seeing his children suffer. In this weakness we can capture God. God loves us in our brokenness. When our hearts are pierced we capture the heart of the Father."

If I believe this, I'm not alone at all. He's embracing me. So why not fully embrace the gift? Why not dwell on the knowledge that God, my Father, is loving me, his daughter, in that moment just as He created me? A new joy began to rise in me in the midst of the suffering.

     "When we are pierced and our sufferings are united with Jesus, blood comes out. The impact of one drop of Jesus—Love—creates craters in the heart—nuclear infinite power. God will flood the world with blood—the drop from the laborers. God needs the blood poured out through heart piercings."

Wow, now that's a pretty radical teaching, but I was relating to it. I was mysteriously being set free. I was feeling greater oneness with Him as I visualized this happening. 

     "The lower I am in my descent with him the greater the impact. It will change your soul and make it like Mary by grace, Jesus by grace. In the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus’ blood dropped on dirt. When Christ is crucified within us we are given the grace to descend even more. God wants to unleash a deeper power upon the church and that is the power of prayer during any heart piercings."

So no matter how awful the pain and suffering, the value can be enormous. In fact, Fr. is saying the greater the suffering the more powerful can be the effect if we are uniting ourselves to His suffering on the cross. Not only are we transformed, but the whole world is transformed. 

     "The stiller we are on the cross the more God can act. Few people can be still on the cross. There are few laborers in the field...We can’t be still on the cross without divine power."

This spoke loudly. It said I can be a laborer as I am "still" on the cross. As I am surrendered--trusting in His divine purpose I can be used by God for His greater glory just by being still. It doesn't mean I can't express myself, but it means I don't try to run from the cross. I endure the suffering however it comes until I pass through it with His grace.

     "The secret weapon—power of God—is not activated when we act without being still and consequently there’s no impact on the world. Only divine power changes the world."

Who doesn't want that? The power of God! Is that not reason for being still? For accepting without complaint, and trusting? For taking time to be quiet in the presence of the Lord and nothing more. For letting Him know how much we love Him by simply being with Him. We need to take the time to surrender at a deeper level.

May grace and peace envelope you in any heart piercing you may experience.

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